I recently had a chat with my friend’s (both men and women) and we were having an interesting conversation. A number of them have had relationships that have led to heartbreaks and breakdowns. Some have sworn to never get into relationships again. I remember one specific comment, “If you want to live a happy life, never fall in love.” “It’s not worth the effort.”
I beg to disagree.
Dating is fun. However, it can also lead to heartbreak. You often end up with people who are full of lies or believing you can change them to fit your desires. But that’s just how life works. To love or fall in love is a risk you take and chances of you ending up with a great person or worse is very high.
Now that we have established heartbreaks can visit you anytime without warning. How do you deal with the pain? If you’re always getting into constant fights, face criticism and rejection from your current or ex-boyfriend/girlfriend. This article is for you.
Do not keep all the raw and painful feelings bottled inside you. It’s okay to express your emotions. And what better way to do that other than crying your heart out. But give yourself a time limit. Wallowing in self-pity for a long period can lead to depression and that is not what we are after here. Giving yourself time to heal is therapeutic especially if you’re still in love with your ex.
Keep off social media
Okay, that is almost impossible, but you can tweak your social site’s settings and hide him/her from your notifications. This will keep you sane instead of stalking him/her throughout the day.
Talk to someone
Hit up your best friend or someone close and talk about it. Talking about how you feel to someone who understands the pain you’re going through will make you feel a lot better. King Solomon, said, “Two people are better off than one, for they can help each other succeed. If one person falls, the other can reach out and help. But someone who falls alone is in real trouble.”
Don’t over react
Now, this is important to note. Don’t go sending him endless messages, calling him at odd hours of the night or showing up at his place unexpected. Embarrassing yourself will not help the situation. Instead, use the time to take care of yourself. Go for some pampering, maybe shopping (if you can afford to squander some few dollars) or a day at your favorite spa will relax your mind.
Your heart is broken and you are sad, as a matter of fact, you are devastated. But that is not the end of the world. Fix your hair, your makeup put on your pretty dress and go out there and have fun. Enjoy life. After all, you only live once. So go out there, meet new people, flirt and just have fun.
Take up a hobby
Do you have something that you have always wanted to learn but for some reason, you have not managed to do it? This, my friends, is the perfect time. If you wanted to learn German, Swahili, read a book, play guitar or cook. This the time to challenge yourself. It will help you forget your troubles and as a bonus, you will equip yourself with a new skill.
Avoid the ‘call’ trap
He’s probably at his house reminiscing on the good old times you two had (you’re probably doing the same, anyway) and he will pick up the phone and call you. Here is how it goes; “Honey, I miss you so much.” You pick up the phone and get all lovey-dovey with him. Next thing you know, you’re in bed together. Silly you! You think you’re back together but the reality dawns on you and you end up heartbroken all over again.
In short, do not answer his calls, do not call him and keep off his favorite joints.
Delete old photos
To make the breakup recovery more effective, get rid of your ex’s pictures from your phone, Facebook and anywhere else you might have placed them. The more you view their images the more the memories you too had together come flooding back, making it harder for you to move on.
Have an open mind
Just because you’ve had a bad experience with your ex doesn’t mean everyone will treat you the same way. You might not be ready to move on just yet, but let someone else be nice to you. Be open to going out for dinner dates and movie nights when invited.
Even thought you might still be in love with your ex, keep in mind that he/she is not the only human on the planet. He might feel like the only man for you but in reality, there is always someone better out there for you. After doing all the above thing, you are now ready to move. Keeping in mind that there are so many nice men and women out here.